...Thing 2

T.G.I.F (first of all)- it has been one of those weeks... a great one, but disguised under the sleep deprivation, bad eating habits and long hours at work. Needless to say, it's Friday, so no more complaining from this girl!

Alright, alright... remember Oh Boy who I had a "thing" with on Tuesday? Well, "thing 2" is tonight.


Lets back track...

Tuesday ended on a pretty positive note with him saying...

"We'll talk later"

I'll take that. As Wednesday came and went, I had heard nothing from him- buuuut if you've learned anything I'm stubborn. I did not call him/ text him... because a. I don't do that... and there's no b.- I simply. don't. text. guys. after. dates.


Here's the deal...


I want one who will chase me, and if I set the precedent that I will chase him and do all the work in the beginning, that's how it will be if we go forward into a relationship. Point. blank. friends. I've been there, don't that, and I will reciprocate effort in a relationship, but I wont carry it on my back- it's tiring.


And also- there should be no communication with the guy until he has time to think about what just happened... see, guys need time to process the experience, the ... "thing" or the date... maybe to distinguish if it was a thing or a date... whatever, they just need time to process it. That's why you leave it up to him to contact you- because if you call him and distract him, he will not be able to see the great person he just had a great thing or date with :)

Gah.... I just want to share so much of Patti's advice with you- it's hard to stay on track, but this is very similar to how my mind works- so scattered.

Anyway...


Thursday came... as I was telling a girlfriend at work about my "thing" on Tuesday she asked if he had contacted me, and I said

"It's only been 2 days girl, if he doesn't call me by tomorrow, we can worry."

NOT 2 minutes later, he texted me. I love moments like this. This fellow and I have a running talk smack game going. I beat him at a game 2 weekends ago and since then, he posed a re-match and we have spent last week getting each other going as far as challenging each other to a re-match. So as I get a message that says,

"There can only be one champion. Prepare to be vanquished"

I got excited. We nonchalantly lined up "thing 2" for tonight- consisting of watching The League, pre-drinking some hot and hard cider, and then a friendly little re-match of beer pong. I may dress up in my Ke$ha costume- would that be too much? I don't think so.

"A man is like a cat; chase him and he will run - Sit still and ignore him and he'll come purring at your feet”

I love this quote, for three reasons:

1. I love cats.

2. I love men.

3. There is nothing but truth in this statement.

As Patti says

"In this man market, with so much competition from other beautiful women, YOU
want to be a mystery, and let him be intrigued by you."

Have I mentioned that I love her? She speaks the truth, and I know this from practice, and from mistake...

Let me tell you a story- I'm hoping you have a minute...

Once upon a time I was asked out by a nice gentlemen who I was introduced
to through a friend who I met and hung out with on a couple occasions at the
bar. Nothing exclusive, until... we exchanged phone numbers, he texted me, even
called me, and then asked me out on a date- for Tuesday night- I know, Tuesday
is NOT Saturday, but Tuesday is also my only weekday night free... so, I let a
weekday date slide for date one... anyway... We meet there, we have good
conversation, we devour some delicious sushi.. it goes well in my opinion... but
as the night comes to an end, he walks me to my house- we live in walking
distance of each other and of the restaurant. As he drops me off, he hugs me and
says,

"Well, call me sometime this week if you want to hang out over the
weekend..."

annnnd, much to my dismay I said

"OK."

(OK?!?!?! WHO AM I??) If I
have learned anything from Patti that is,

LET HIM CALL YOU!

This is not a hard concept.

Take notes--

As women, the phone can be are best friend or our worst enemy.

Women tend to use the phone to chat all day about ...well, nothing. We talk about our breakfast, our work day, how we feel, what we're doing later, who said something rude to us... the list goes on.

Men use the phone to talk about... business. Simple.

He or she that calls most has the most interest, and least control. Let me tell you a secret... I LOVE having control. Won't lie. I want the ball in my court at.all.times. and to do this, I will not call a guy more than he calls me, and that is that. I don't care how much I like him... if I like a boy more than he likes me, I have no control, and I might be seen as needy and demanding, and ONLY my sister is allowed to see that side of me- got it?

When a guy does call you, remember the "allure of again" as one of my best guy friends dubs it... only give him 15 minutes on the phone and then give him an upbeat excuse on why you have to get off.. and do not say you have to watch Jersey Shore. Make something up, for real.

Alright- the basics, we're not calling guys, they're calling us- right?

Let them chase you... it will be worth it!

In my experience I shared with you above, I should have kindly told him that...

"I'm a traditional girl- I prefer you to call me."

Instead, I spent 2 days wondering if I should call him... and in the end he texted me- we hung out again, had a good time, but that was 2 weeks ago.

I've saved myself some trouble and heartache on wondering if he likes me or not and have come to the simple conclusion that

He's just not that into me if he's not calling me...

NEXT PLEASE!

My thing...

So, I had a "thing" the other day... when I say a thing... let me explain.

I'm not sure how it happened, but after a few endless jabs about how I beat a guy friend of mine at beer pong, we started talking/texting/exchanging friendly flirtatous comments on facebook. I'm not sure where our 'friendship' of sorts took a turn, but when he asked me to help him heckle our mutual friend at the new restaurant where he is a waitor, I said

"Only if I can order like Sally, on When Harry Met Sally"

... much to my surprise (not really) he had not seen the movie. So I suggested a movie night,

"I'll bring snacks"

I said... and he replied back with,

"I'll bring the wine."

Couldn't argue with that.

Thus leading us to my Tuesday night thing.

I told my closest guy friend about this and he says "A thing? ... let me say this, if it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck... then, what do you think it is?"

Whatever this was, the night went well. With 4 glasses of wine under my belt, some great hors d'oeuvres, a fantastic movie and not terrible company, I left with him saying

"We'll talk later."

Leaving me still at a loss on whether this was just a thing, or if it was in fact, a date.

Which poses a new challenge... is it my call, or his??

Here we go...

I understand, it has been quite a while since I've dropped in, but in honor of Patti's new New York season, I thought I'd drop a line and say hi... "HIIII"


Since we last talked, a lot of things have gone on in my life that I can not even begin to catch you up on... let's just say, I've back tracked a bit from Patti, and in the lesson's I've learned, I've decided I'm ready to Practice again.

I'm ready to take care of myself.

I'm ready to have fun, without being "that girl."

I'm ready to date.

I'm ready to get out of my comfort zone.

I'm ready to get rejected.

I'm ready to laugh,

I'm ready to live and...

I'm ready to love.

So, let's try this again. And this time around I'm sharing my stories, and I'm giving a gallant effort, because ladies and gents, I'm ready.... I think.